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Thread: Cool Craigslist post

  1. #1
    Supporting Vendor Looking for Dirt Synthetic Advantage's Avatar
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    Cool Craigslist post


  2. #2
    Lifetime Member Getting Dirty Matt's Avatar
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    lmao. Like i said on the truck forum, i'd like to go check this jeep out just to have a beer with that dude

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    Senior Member Getting Dirty The_War_Wagon's Avatar
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    -Does the 4WD work?
    Hell yes. Like a Dickensian Orphan.
    '07 Jeep Commander, Rocky Mountain Edition - 287 V-8 - Superchipped - aFe Stage II R-5A CAI - Flowmaster Super 44 - 2" Daystar lift - Spidertrax spacers - 32x10.5x17 Cooper A/T's - Fastman throttlebody - Skyjacker 8000 shocks

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    Senior Member Getting Dirty hoaxci5's Avatar
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    quoted so it isn't preserved for a lifetime

    1997 Jeep Cherokee (XJ)
    220K Miles
    4.0 L in-line 6
    4WD
    AUTOMATIC Transmission
    Bright Red
    Straight Stock
    Crank Windows, no cruise, no tilt, no delay wiper, no nonsense
    POWER MIRRORS! Woo Hoo!

    $1750

    Here's the deal, kids:
    This is a Jeep Cherokee. This is not a luxury SUV, or a maintenance-free disposable import. It has solid front axles, wind noise, and character.
    It's a Jeep. It rides like a Jeep. It drives like a Jeep. All of these are GOOD things.
    It is not new, it is not pristine, it is used. This will be apparent in the pictures.


    If you do not own a toolbox, have never changed your own oil, and are scared of firearms: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.
    If you have been posting on facebook all about how excited you are for pumpkin latte season: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.
    If you get offended easy and often, whine to your co-workers, and bitch a lot: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.
    If you feel you are owed anything in the world & have a bull**** job where you fail to produce: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.
    If you own a bieber album, white oakleys, affliction t-shirts, or those candy-assed stitched-pocket jeans: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.
    If you consider the 2nd Amendment an anachronistic relic and have never owned a firearm: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.


    If, however, you have BALLS OF STEEL and consider adverse weather an excuse to do stupid ****: THIS IS YOUR JEEP.
    Do you laugh at danger, and tempt fate?
    Have you ever uttered the words, "Hold my beer and watch this ..."?
    While bored at work do you pick targets at random and think, "I could hit that from here with the .22 ..."?
    Have any of your friends quit hanging out because you were too much fun?
    Do you have the number of a friend with cash memorized for bail?
    When you pass an abandoned flatbed farm truck along a fenceline do you consider taking on another project?
    Is your ol' lady really sick of the random piles of parts, greasy footprints, and empty beer bottles in the garage?
    -could you not care less?
    Do you have Jalopnik saved on your laptop AND smartphone?
    Do you own a service manual for every vehicle you ever owned?
    Do you still miss your first ride?
    Can you carry on a two hour conversation discussing tools, scars, and hi-lift jacks?
    Remember when tool companies had the balls to put half-naked beauty queens on their calendars?
    Do you consider the Prius an abominable affront to the Gods of displacement, torque, and All Mighty Internal Combustion?


    If you answered in the affirmative to the preceding: THIS IS YOUR JEEP.

    DETAILS:
    -I am the second owner. First owner barely got it dirty and engaged the front axles once.
    -I have remedied this excessive caretaking with muddy roads and a pile of fun.
    -The motor uses a little oil. How much? I don't know, I'm not collecting statistical analysis points.
    I check the oil, I fill the oil, I drive. Not enough to bother me.
    -It leaks a little oil. How much? Not enough for me to care. It has 220,000 miles, Poindexter!
    If you have a vehicle with 220K NOT leaking or burning oil, it's empty!
    -Rear bumper has a big-ass crease in it. I dented it backing into a concrete pole. Sober.
    We drove away giggling, for the record. Haven't fixed it.
    -Driver's side door was caught by the wind, whipped forward, got into the LF quarter panel.
    -Radiator has a small leak. Pinhole. I can replace the radiator or you can. Really doesn't matter
    A new radiator and hoses will run $145. If you don't want to replace them I will.
    Add $250 to the price of vehicle. This includes radiator, hoses, and labor (beer). A freaking bargain.
    -The badass little 4.0L bullet-proof in-line six starts and runs like the proverbial champ.
    -Tranny and 4WD operate perfectly
    -Tires will need replaced in a couple thousand miles. I haven't upgraded because I had plans:
    Had planned a small lift, upgrade to 17" Wrangler wheels, and more aggressive tires.
    Life got in the way - it ain't happening.
    -Zombie stickers on the right rear window stay. My daughter's idea, take it up with her.
    -Flogging Molly sticker stays as well. They kick ass, so there.

    QUESTIONS:
    -Why are you selling?
    I can't justify owning it anymore. Motorsickles, kiddos, work, travel, and beer have consumed my time and money.
    Someone else needs to appreciate the Jeep for what it is: awesome mechanical artistry.

    -What's wrong with it?
    Radiator. Small oil leaks. Driver's side door cosmetic issues.
    And it's pissed it has been neglected and parked. It needs rescued.

    -Does the 4WD work?
    Hell yes. Like a Dickensian Orphan.

    -Will you sell me the [engine / tranny / rear door / axle / etc.]?
    No. I'm not in the salvage business. Buy the Jeep. Love the Jeep. Give the Jeep a home.

    -Will you take [insert ridiculously stupid low number here]?
    No. If I wanted [ridiculously low number] I would have asked [ridiculously low number]
    Want a cheap car? Get your kid that lowered tuner piece of **** honda project down the road.
    I think I'm plenty cheap for this bad mofo.

    -Why is it still stock?
    Because I bought it for a daily driver with the intention of turning it into a project.
    I haven't had the time to do so. So I am selling it.

    -Can I put a 6" lift and giant tires on it?
    I don't give a ****. But be sure to use quality components and for God's sake - get it aligned after a lift!

    -Would this make a good car for my daughter?
    Hell. Yes. Not only a good car, a learning experience. Introduction to vehicular maintenance.
    Additionally, there isn't really enough room in the back for that little ******* she's dating to try anything.

    -Can you deliver?
    Within reason. I'd drive it a hundred miles or so. But really, you should come get it. Look it over. Have a beer. Etc.

    -Will you take a check / cashier's check / Western Union Transfer / Nigerian Promissory Note?
    Would you take a ball pein hammer to the forehead?
    No. I'll take Cash. Period. Bring cash or don't show.

    -Will you ship to -?
    No. See above.

    -No, really, all I have is [lowball dollar amount]?
    That's great, I don't give a ****. Unicef ain't running this deal, and until they do I want $1750.
    Why? Because I don't HAVE to sell this little beauty. Truth be known, I'd rather keep it.
    But if it's going to a good home - I will sell. Unless you're an asshole - then no sale.

    -Why are you such a dick?
    Everything is relative; you should see my friends.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Getting Dirty The_War_Wagon's Avatar
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    ^^^ Good thinking! Some wussy already got sand in his, and had it flagged and removed.
    '07 Jeep Commander, Rocky Mountain Edition - 287 V-8 - Superchipped - aFe Stage II R-5A CAI - Flowmaster Super 44 - 2" Daystar lift - Spidertrax spacers - 32x10.5x17 Cooper A/T's - Fastman throttlebody - Skyjacker 8000 shocks

  6. #6
    Senior Member Getting Dirty Adondo's Avatar
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    It's still there and I flagged it myself... as the 'best of' CL. Notice also that the gas gauge is down to 1/8th. Somehow that just strikes me as funny 'cause it just fits in with the rest of this ad.

    I absolutely LOVE that bullet shell trip reset button!!

    Enid is where my grandpa lived for a while, so I've been there and seen the place. It's redneck central. (A good thing as far as I'm concerned)

    That red clay on the road it's parked on is the kind of stuff that where it rains, you get taller (and your boots heavier) with every step.
    2006, 4.7L, QTII, Toyo Wild Country M/T 265/70R17 tires, Ultrasport 175 wheels, Rocky Road 2.25'' lift kit, HID off-road lighting, Surco 50x60 roof rack, Foxwing awning, Superchips performance programming.

  7. #7
    Supporting Vendor Looking for Dirt Synthetic Advantage's Avatar
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    Someone posted to Craigslist, to the add above wanting to meet that person. Here is the post. LOL

    1997 Jeep Cherokee (XJ) - $1750 (Stroud, OK)
    Is this still available? If not, are you? Someone I know basically fell in love with you because of this craigslist ad, and she'd love to get to know you! She tried responding to the ad, and got a disappointing message in return that said "Craigslist does not forward messages for expired or deleted." Here it is for your reading pleasure-

    "This is the greatest Craiglist ad I have ever seen. Ever.
    Are you single?
    I owned the exact same Jeep, except it was a '95, green, 4 cylinder, 2-door, manual, no power mirrors (those are for wimps).
    Sold mine for $550 over KBB (with a cracked exhaust manifold).
    I think we're soul mates.
    -XOXOX"

    Email me so I can get you two in touch!

  8. #8
    Lifetime Member Getting Dirty Matt's Avatar
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    I swear it wasn't me.....

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